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Friday, October 31, 2003

Alert! We have Jennifer Garner rampaging through the Senate!

So a toy gun shut down Capitol Hill yesterday. I wonder if the security guard who was "distracted" and let the "gunslingers" through is contacting a temp agency today.

Seriously, though, how the hell did this happen? I don't have any doubt that security guards are human like the rest of us, but gee whiz, you kind've expect them to at least look at the X-ray monitors for guns.

And more importantly, how the hell did everyone get their stories wrong? It was first reported as one unknown white male who grabbed the bag and ran before the guard could react; it turned out to be two white females who worked there who took their bags and leisurely walked on into the building. There comes a point (male vs. female is one of them!) where bad eyewitness testimony goes beyond "mistakes" and into "willful self-deception." I'm surprised they didn't have the imagined culprit become an Arab with an AK-47. (I'm sure that's what Ashcroft would have seen had he been on the X-ray machine. Or maybe he just would have seen the women as nekkid.)

As if that wasn't bad enough, at almost the same time there was an unattended U-Haul truck that sent the Pentagon into a tizzy; that turned out to be completely benign, too, but these two unrelated events were enough to bring me close to panic, I freely admit. Sometimes I hate living in the Washington area; yesterday was one of those times.

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