Not so much beautiful as... ineffable. That thing you always reached for but never quite got.
Or, worse, that thing you never even saw, but just imagined. And the wondering--the "what if?"--never goes away, does it?
Eyes in a mirror, a smile... a turn of phrase.
Yet all gone. No, not gone--never was. A dream, possibly (or definitely) eclipsed by the joy of reality. And never knowing whether you were dreamed of, too.
And the worry: is wondering a form of betrayal--or worse, rape?
(In other news, tomorrow is my birthday.)